AVOIDING THE PITFALLS (DANGER) OF EGO & PRIDE
Pride and ego are human traits. They can ruin a life, business, or a relationship. However, like a great doctor, we need to understand and diagnose what ego and pride is before discussing about how to avoid the pitfalls of these general pandemic.
First, what is Pride? Pride is simply an attitude shown by anyone who often believes, inexcusably, that they are better than others are – whether in possession or in achievement. It is a kind of satisfying feeling someone has for achieving or having something special that people admire. Most people are so prideful that they do not even understand the harm it is doing to them and people around them. Pride can continue to grow until it is almost inexorable. Ego on its own is nothing more than pride in its bloated state. It is simply your sense of self-esteem or self-importance.
Every emotions, feelings, attitude, and mindset of an egoistic person have degrees of emphasis or dominance. People with ego exhibits pride in their character, and it reflects in their actions. Whenever they have an encounter that does not favor them, they feel their importance is compromised or they are losing their value. Fear of rejection, jealousy, and perfection are a few
issues that come hand in hand with ego and pride.
If what we are discussing tugs at you, even just a little bit, this article will take you through some pitfalls of ego and pride in relationships, business, and career, and what you can do to avoid them.
EGO & PRIDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Pride can become a huge problem in relationships, and can ruin family relations, love affair, and friendship. We all have pride deeply rooted in our heart. A relationship with one or two proud and ego-filled partners is almost certainly bound to collapse.
Some pitfalls of ego and pride in a relationship can arise when a partner:
- Is arrogant, overbearing, and often thinks very high of him/herself and little of their partner.
- Can never be told about him/herself.
- Usually never want to apologize
- DO not know how to handle a different opinion
- Do not want to hear your partner’s opinion unless it corresponds with theirs
- Is always right in their eyes and will want to instruct their partner on what they should do with their lives
- Do not know how to put others first etc.
If left unchecked, both ego and pride can breed malice, aggression, one-upmanship, increased conflict with your partner, hatred, bad decisions, materialism, infidelity and even break a relationship. They also destroy intimacy, erode trust, and your ability to admit to weakness or mistakes.
While no one can deny the pitfalls of ego and pride in relationships, only few partners can detect these warning signs early and take actions to avoid them. So what do you do to avoid these pitfalls in your relationship?
HOW TO AVOID THE PITFALLS (DANGER) OF EGO & PRIDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
- Leave your ego and pride at the door: Any relationship that feels like it is about to fall apart is a delicate thing. No matter how much you feel you are right, having your pride and ego get in the way is the last thing you would want to do. You need to rock the boat gently until you can evaluate your feelings and decipher how to handle issues in your relationship. You also need to bring down your walls so your partner will more likely trust you with their vulnerabilities.
- Avoid arguments by all costs: Do you argue over ridiculous things? Is it that you do not feel like best friends any longer? Do the two of you seem to be drifting apart? It is simple to bring your ego into a dispute, but having two different egos will only trigger the fight further. Of course, it is fine to argue, but that does not mean you should allow it look beyond your ego. Try to understand the angle from where your partner is coming from. If you feel your partner is being stubbornly proud or letting their pride decides for them, find another way to reach out to them. Understand why your partner behaves the way he/she does. By so doing, you will avoid any slight arguments and in some cases, nib their bud before they arise.
- Build your relationship – When people think high of themselves, they go the extra mile to protect their perceived status for fear of failure. Rather than spend time nerve-racking on your bruised pride, you can try building a healthy relationship with your partner. Think about any underlying problem that makes you pick on each other for things that usually do not bother you. Learn more about a proven step-by-step guide to turning things around.
- Be flexible – If the jokes your partner make keeps hurting you, it is simply because you take it personally. It may seem that your partner does not respect you and making fun of you, but that is false. Do not be too serious. Be flexible, and it is better not to let every little thing get at you. Remember your partner is with you because they respect and love you.
- Learn to Accept mistakes – One obvious sign of ego or pride is when you think you are always right in your eyes. Denying your mistake as a defense mechanism is wrong. If your partner can prove you a liar, the trust may not be there again. You start feeling guilty, and regret arises, which you cannot express just because you have lied. Learning to accept your mistakes will boost your confidence and give you an opportunity to improve.
- Keep your Accomplishments – Being boastful about what you have in your life can mess up your love life. When you always talk of your successes, you make your partner feel inferior and they won’t feel any good around you. Allowing your pride to speak your mind can create issues in your relationship, even a breakup. Rather than brag about your achievements, be humble and encourage your partner to work hard. It makes your partner feel equal in the relationship.
- Think From Other’s standpoint – For a healthy relationship, you and your partner needs to understand each other and respect each other’s viewpoint. When your ego pushes you to fight, it is mostly because you fail to reason from your partner’s viewpoint. This happens because you feel you are always right and your partner is wrong. You cannot be right always. Put yourself in other people’s shoes and walk a mile. You will understand why your partner thinks the way they do. This way, you will have a better relationship with your partner.
EGO & PRIDE IN BUSINESS
As companies focus on improving their businesses, it is doubly important to forget ego and pride and focus on the mission of your business. You need not have a perceptibly inflated sense of self for it to become a problem in your business. Of course, ego is a key asset that must be respected for its input and value; it must also be kept in check. As your business grows, your ego must create room that allows everyone and everything grows up around it. If your ego is in charge, it can negatively affect your business’s success while damage your ability to offer positive leadership. A leader who arrogantly displays self-pride may find it difficult to prepare for times of failure, crisis, and personal errors, and would yield to conceit, arrogance, egotism and gall.
How to know that ego and pride is in charge of your business
- You believe no other person really understands how to do everything the right way.
- You have trouble seeking for help
- Despite having capable hands in place, you believe your business cannot run without you thereby denying yourself holidays.
- You find it difficult to admit when you are wrong
- Your decision-making is based on your preferences without considering what your customers would choose.
- You believe everything is right about your business, despite not being where you would like to be.
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO AVOID THE PITFALL (DANGER) OF EGO & PRIDE IN BUSINESS
- Display Humility – People are generally more receptive to humility than egoism, especially when a leader is the cause of failure. A great leader should let their followers understand their weaknesses, as this act will not only improve trust in the company, but also create a deeper belief in the leader.
- Forget about Self-Promotion – When a leader makes effort to right the wrong by boasting of how great he is or what he has done to bring up the business to the point it is, the message becomes clear that the leader cannot accept his own flaws. A good leader would stop propping up themselves on a pedestal and acknowledge that they are human like others.
- Defeat the Fear of fallibility – Unfortunately, the world does not accept mistakes even though no human is faultless. Similarly, leaders should understand that they are not perfect. However, great leaders would embrace their flaws and use it to mold humility for his team. Of course, it takes courage to stand before people and say you are imperfect. Great leaders do it repeatedly.
- Build your team and Trust them. You do not have to wear all the hats. Being a small business owner does not mean being by yourself. The moment you experience a certain growth level, it may become impossible to do everything on your own. Train some people who can handle the business on your absence. Work with them to fill any gaps in their skills and knowledge. You can then relax and plan that long overdue holiday. You may take a short break first to test the waters. This will give you the proof you need to know whether or not everything will be fine in the future.
- Set goals: Be sure that your goals are Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Time-based (SMART). This verified model will ensure that you are not setting your team or yourself up for failure.
- Be customer-centric: Business models of today emphasize the need to be ‘customer-centric’. There is loads of evidence to support its importance towards the success of your business. Focus on what your customer needs and how your products or services can enhance their lives.
- Ask for help – Understanding that you need help and asking for one is not weakness, but wisdom. A great leader needs to have a mentor, some selected group of people that they can go to for help, encouragement, advice, support as well as a sounding board for ideas
- Admit it when you are wrong: The moment you start to passionately argue for something that is not just working or will not have the expected results, it is wise to fall on your sword and admit it. It takes far less energy and a greater courage to do this compared to flogging a dead horse. People give much respect to leaders who can admit they are wrong and learn from their mistakes..
- Keep everything in perspective – The world is a huge place and each of us is only a tiny part of it. Therefore, you are already on your way to failure if you feel you or your work is more important than that of others. A great leader would instill in their employees that no one is better than another. They are all equally important to the success of the company. The moment a leader presents him/herself as the “Almighty Ruler,” they will lose the trust and perhaps the respect of their employees.
There is really no harm in feeling proud of your achievements. The problem however, is when you allow pride and ego to keep you from minimizing risk and leading your company’s vision. Be humble, avail every opportunity to learn, and be committed to achieving the growth you want to see.
EGO & PRIDE IN YOUR CAREER
Do you find yourself moving from one job to another without attaining the level of success you desire? Are you constantly arguing with your superiors at your job? Do you feel you have answers to everything and no one else is right? Perhaps you have a hard time listening to others when they offer you a piece of advice in your career. It may probably be indications that you have pride and ego issue, and you may not even realize it. When people indulge your ego, they can easily influence you in many ways you never even thought possible. Getting over ego and pride in your life is necessary in your road to career success. So what do you do?
AVOIDING THE PITFALL (DANGER) OF EGO & PRIDE IN YOUR CAREER
- Hang out with successful people – Find people that are more successful and start to hang out with them. They are far beyond what you have accomplished in your current life, and will give your ego a good kick in the butt to help pull you to the next level.
- Remember no one is Perfect – We all have our individual limitations. You cannot work or achieve more than your capability, and cannot attain perfection regardless of how much you try: There will definitely be something that you cannot do. You also need to understand that you are not the best. We all have our unique sets of qualities and skills, which other people may lack. Therefore, you should respect other people for who they are.
- Let humility be part of you – Never go about thinking you are the only person who can make things happen. You are only responsible for your part of the work. of course, it is fine to take pleasure in those achievements. You also need to know that other people are involved in your success. When you let people around you see it that you truly appreciate and value them – more than just your own recognition – they will be much more inclined to work together with you towards a mutual success.
Life is too short for pride and ego to get in the way of your career, business or relationship. There is virtually no gain in being egoistic or proud; it is simply old-fashioned and isolating. Do not allow any disagreement to linger or ignore little issues. They are like seeds and once they develop, they will become a tree and may be difficult to control. Furthermore, never miss great opportunities because of the ego and pride in your life. Do not think you know more than your colleagues or everyone else. Asking yourself questions like, “what can I learn from this person that I do not know?” will take you a long way in life.
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